how i'm doing...

 life update bc i haven't in a while.

to be honest with you guys, i've been struggling still. since i have major depression, not to mention anhedonia, it's bound to be a really long journey. i'm looking forward to the coming months, however, since major depression has been shown to last around sixth months, and i'm currently in my sixth month. wow... that's kinda crazy.

i seriously doubt it's just gonna disappear some random day this month. but i reckon things are gonna look brighter soon. i really hope so.

God's been doing work, as always. i'm struggling with my faith rn, especially lacking in some spiritual fellowship areas. i'm not really sure where to turn on that account. i was formerly seeking a new youth group, but i realised maybe that was a rash decision and countered that. since we're staying at our youth group, which i highly disklike, as it's incredibly clicky and always has been, i need to find fellowship elsewhere. qutie frankly... i can't. i have no days of the week for a bible study and i'm not at camp enough for it to be completey fulfilling(although weekends at camp are always majorly spiritually fulfilling for sure).

so um... not really sure what to do on that account. working through it, and i know God will provide answers in his good timing. all i can do is look, pray, and wait.

i guess if ya'll wanted to be praying for me, my spiritual journey, and my mental state, i'd appreciate it. going into my sixth month tho, actually crazy. i hope that's a good thing lol.

thanks for reading my ramblings lol peace out ✌🏽😘